Exercises that we recommend in sexual therapy for erectile dysfunction
Couple cuddling is very effective since anxiety is one of the key factors in erectile dysfunction, and one of the objectives is to eliminate anxiety or reduce it that man feels in the face of relationships that involve penetration. The first thing to ensure that the couple is more relaxed must enhance the sensuality in their intimate encounters and exclude sexual intercourse. Have you wondered why they suffer so much from penetration? Objective: enjoy intimate partner again. Is sex playful, remember? Go ahead, let’s enjoy again!
When the couple starts the erotic game full of eroticism and sensuality excluding coitus, we give some exercises aimed at reducing the anxiety of execution that appears in the man before intercourse, since what is indicated is that there is no penetration in sexual encounters . For this, the couple establishes shifts (first you, then me) in body massage and caresses whose requirement is to give and receive pleasure, without demands.
It is not necessary that the erection appears, nor is it necessary to caress us until we get an orgasm. At the beginning we have to start the caresses excluding the genitals. Why is it done like this? It is that our whole body is erogenous and we must concentrate on the eroticism of our skin. So you have to start exploring the body and its sensual potential but without caressing our genitals. Do you find it difficult? Try it! Take it as a great learning of that sexuality that you share. If you have reached this first goal, we continue … To move on to another phase we will go to the caresses in which you can include the genitals, but … We still do not advise coitus!
And during these exercises there is sexual communication between the couple: they express their tastes and sexual preferences. This part of sexual knowledge between the two is fundamental, because many times couples do not know their partners’ sexual preferences even though they have been together for years. Tell your partner the caresses that you like, how you like to be stimulated and caressed and indicated what you do not like. The goal is to talk about your sexuality in common, without fear, without restrictions, and with respect towards your partner. Maybe you have not touched this topic for a long time, give yourself permission to talk about sex and listen to each other. Realize that you are on the road to recover your sexuality.
And it is that during these exercises neither the man nor the woman have to think about the erection. If there is no communication you will not understand … This is your opportunity, take advantage of it!
The man practices self-stimulation to learn to gradually control the erection. Because masturbation is an advisable practice in men with erectile dysfunction, since it favors the vascularization of the penis and strengthens the musculature of the pelvis. That is why it is time for you to start masturbation, it is a great sexual practice, which we are going to use now in Sexual Therapy to learn how to control the erection. If you think you can help with readings or some erotic movie as motivation. Remember that erotic fantasies will help you get excited.
During the practice of these masturbation exercises, the male must lose the fear that the erection is lost or lowered. The objective to pursue with these exercises that you are going to start practicing is that you lose the fear that your erection will not be maintained or that you lose it at some time during the sexual encounter. So far it is likely that when you have lost the erection you have blocked and have not been able to recover it. Now you are going to change the situation, you are going to learn that losing an erection is no problem, you just have to recover it. You will get it with this learning.
For this, he is instructed in the technique of stopping and starting (Semans 1956), and in practice he learns that when he has a good erection, he stimulates himself until he returns to a state of sagging. Then it is stimulated again until you get the erection again … It is an exercise that you do three or four times in each masturbation.
Later the woman can masturbate her partner and cause her to lose and recover the erection with the stop and start technique. He stimulates and repeats the erection / loss of erection sequence several times until he feels safe and calm when he sees how the erection recovers. The most important thing at this stage is that you become familiar with the erection in front of the woman leaving behind the fear of failure. Repeat it 3 or 4 times and repeat it until you reach orgasm. So you can verify together that the erection can be recovered with trust and mutual complicity. What is the next step! Penetration and its guidelines.
To practice the next step, the position of the man on his back and the woman on the man’s pubis is recommended. This posture facilitates the penetration of both, and it will be the woman who enters the erect penis into the vagina.
The purpose of this exercise is that the man is not afraid of losing the erection inside the vagina, and that he is aware that he can recover it by himself. Now I will explain how it is achieved.
The man remains lying on his back with the penis inside the vagina without moving until he notices that the erection disappears. Neither of them moves until the erection of the man in the vagina disappears. When the man loses the erection, the couple’s masturbation exercises are repeated until he regains the erection and the woman proceeds to insert the penis into her vagina until without movements she loses the erection again inside the vagina. The benefits will appear soon continuing with the practice.
In the penetration with movements they continue gradually with the same procedure they follow so far and in the same position of the woman in a superior position, but with coital movements directed by the man. The man grabbing the woman’s hips, the guide in the movement of intercourse, and after several vaginal thrusts, removes the penis until he loses the erection, Penetrates and makes several movements in the intercourse, then removes the penis and lowers the erection. Start stimulating the penis out of the vagina and again introduce the penis repeating the same cycle.
Then you can practice free coitus with pleasure movements, which can last until both reach orgasm. Go testing and testing different movements. Maybe starting with slow movements until you gain more control of the erection can be a good start. If at any time the erection goes down you already have resources to recover it: remove the penis from the vagina and stimulate it until you recover the erection. As you have tried so far in these exercises.
And the most important thing to be effective is your motivation. It cannot be achieved without spending time and practice. These exercises have helped multiple couples. Do not be discouraged! Why don’t they help you? Of course, if the problem is too big for you, go to a professional. Do not hesitate!